Heartache – Is it real? - LPNI

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Heartache – Is it real?

LPNI Health Topic – February 2023

Heartache: the real phenomenon one feels when there is a loss – of anything. Normally, we associate heartache with loss through the death of a loved one, and that is fine. But let us look at some other losses that may produce heartache!

First, I do not want to minimize that the death of a loved one, and suggest that it is not heartbreaking. However, other loss situations that need to be validated include divorce, a broken relationship, family estrangement, loss of a job, loss of belongings through natural disaster, and so on. You can certainly add to the list! But would it surprise you that the list should include moving, retirement, and receiving a new family member?

Moving may include such reasons as a need for increased assistance, downsizing, and job transfers. Remember that even with the best of reasons, moving will involve a loss of friends, church family, neighborhood, doctors, and so on.

Retirement? Why would someone experience heartache when they retire? If their vocation was their life, now that they have retired, what do they look forward to each day? Depression and isolation are integral factors of heartache.

A new family member can change everything. The joy of a miracle child can be overshadowed by the nights of fevers, the cough when there are contagious viruses around, the allergies etc. These are the things that can literally hurt the hearts of new parents.

New research shows that heartache can be both physical and emotional. It shows that the same pain regions in the brain fire up with both emotional and physical pain. Can one die of a broken heart? There have been many examples of spouses who have been married for many years, where one death is followed by the unexpected death of the other in a matter of days or weeks.

Physical symptoms can include a rapid heartbeat, muscle tightening especially in the chest, shortness of breath, nausea, vomiting, weakness, fainting, and getting too much sleep or not being able to sleep. Emotional symptoms can include depression, isolation, and heightened stress over unimportant things.

If you have had the opportunity to minister to someone who is grieving, you will see that grief and a broken heart are quite similar. In both, one feels like he or she is all alone and carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders. In such situations, we can hold on to the promise of Jesus who tells us: ‘Come to me, all you who are heavy laden, and I will give you rest’ (Matthew 11:28 LSB). In this world there are many things that we just do not have answers for, but as followers of Jesus Christ, we can hold onto the promise that he will give us rest.

All praise and glory to God!

Sue Neff, RN, Parish Nurse, ret. 39783 St. Honore Dr. Murrieta, CA, USA 9256